Complaining

There are days when everything feels like too much, and I am tempted to complain or rant. But what purpose does this serve?

What you’re supposed to do when you don’t like a thing is change it. If you can’t change it, change the way you think about it. Don’t complain.

― Maya Angelou

Daily Stoic often talks about how much control we have over our own lives. More than we think. We have control over our thoughts, our perception, and how we handle our emotions. 

In one of the articles titled Don’t Complain or Blame, Stephen Hanselman writes, “Complaining is so comforting precisely because it excuses us from taking responsibility for our own thoughts and actions”. 

I realise that my desire to complain stems from a feeling of lack of control. When I don’t know how to handle a situation, when I am tired of handling things, the urge to complain becomes stronger. 

But if I pause, step back and really analyse the situation, it becomes clear that there’s something that I can do about it. And if there truly is nothing that I can do about externalities, there’s always something that I can do internally. 

I can change my behaviour towards a situation that seems unpleasant. I can remove myself from the surroundings I perceive as negative. I can find a way to navigate through an undesirable setting. 

There are always choices and the choice I make is within my control. 

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